Featuring, From the cast of The Reeking Hegs: The one and only Ray and his Nephew!
Ray and his Nephew were trappers by trade, their office located on the outskirts of Ugzcyk, capital city of Solid King Solid Fume III. Having nothing much more than time to kill they agreed to take part in the search for The Reeking Hegs – or, more specifically, to locate and trap Mr.Yick; reputedly the only person alive or dead thereabouts who knew how to get them there.
Trappers were Ray and his nephew. It was with their assistance I resolved to ensnare Yick back into the plot so that he would lead me to the Hegs unwittingly. Yick? Yes, the rumour was he was back in the rooting, living out in the tundra, cryo-static in a grotto.
The Reeking Hegs, Canto 5
Their quest takes them deep into the frozen hinterlands of Fume’s kingdom. A place fit only for hardy folk. Foolhardy, perhaps, if your complement of legs was limited to but two. Ray and his nephew – well, probably just Ray – considered the accomplishment of this task would forever raise their names above and beyond the hoi-polloi of everyday trappers. His nephew was mostly engaged in naked combats with canines and/or cephalopods over his discarded furs.
Out in those there parts habitation was scarce. The ice ridges penetrated the dwarf pines and sedges. Among frozen creeks and ravines progress was slow. They eventually came upon a remote scarred landscape brimming rimy desolation and hardy mosquitos.
The Reeking Hegs, Canto 5
Their big lead comes after a chance encounter with a local yokel and Towser his pet husky. Initially productive of nothing more more noteworthy than a severe beating for Ray, the yokel mistaking him for a spook out for a bit of soul-stealing, things look up as Ray passes out. Having resolved the spook issue, the yokel leads the trappers to a remote graveyard. There , in the corner, they find Yick’s tombstone and immediately begin to assemble their trapping apparatus, observed by the yokel, Towser, The Reverend Fullalov, a flock of nuns and Yick’s ma.
What happens in the graveyard is one of the top-hoorific passages of The Reeking Hegs.
Ray fought off a surge of leeches from his trench. He didn’t recall having anything like so much trouble on his last great trapping adventure, snaring a mighty grizzly five igloos high by the name of Ho Nazareth. The nuns cackled again, lightning flashed, and once more a ponderous tolling rang out from the bell tower at the centre of the Bog forsaken graveyard. Towser howled and the earth and leeches in Yick’s grave shuddered.
Whether they failed or not is a moot point, easily enough resolved. Let no more be said than their subsequent appearance in the narrative takes place on the studio floor of ‘Bucks Full House’, a highly by lovers of mayhem and gore rated TV quiz-show. Sadly, they distinguished themselves for causing much confusion around the fishing-hole and for the unexpected revelation of the nephew’s noble lineage!: The Reeking Hegs, canto 5
FUME: And Ray’s nephew is herewith knighted Duke of Disko Bay. Fetch me my trusted cleaver…
The Reeking Hegs, Canto 9
So folks, there in brief be the part taken by Ray and his nephew in the deepest mystery of all times. THE REEKING HEGS. Published by Montag Press, S.F.Ca, in 2020. Avail yourself of a copy – paperback, ebook and/or audiobook – from any Amazone outlet.
The Reeking Hegs 
The arctic will never be the same.
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